Faithful†Son

Give Me Your Eyes For Just One Second.

It’s been a very interesting freshman year of college.  And that is putting it lightly.  It’s been about 6 months since I have stepped into my first class here at FSU and, to be honest, I would have never expected the change that would overcome me.  Not only in the physical and mental sense, but also the spiritual and social.  I have grown so much in my faith that there are some days where I can’t help but stop and talk to God for hours.  I have rediscovered my love for playing music through worship and Christian music and have felt my love for others and my Lord grow until I feel that I’m nothing but love and passion.  I am starting to actually live out my faith in my life, growing bolder as my heart softens.  I have met some amazing friends and have built relationship that will last the rest of my life.  I am in an amazing Worship band for an amazing campus ministry.  I am doing well in school.  What more can I ask for?  It’s days like these when I remember just how blessed I am.

It’s interesting.

I looked back in my blog and found the post before I went to YFC Camp this summer where I accepted Christ into my life.  It’s crazy how much that week changed me.  I may have stumbled since then, but that is where my faith took root and have been growing ever since.

Greater things are yet to come, and greater things are still to be done in this city.

     Not only this city, but on this campus and in our own hearts.  Because I know that I, a faith-drunk freshman in college, have SO much more to do in my very own heart and soul.  The scars that cover me, both physically, emotionally and mentally, will remain for a long time, slowly fading away but never fully healing.  I have to take all my experiences in life, relationships, my priorities and turn them upside down, twist them 180 and be the man that I never was and want to be.  I want to be the man who can love all, no matter their past, present, or future.  Because who am I to judge them when I sin just as much or more. I want to be the man who can look sin and temptation in the face and say, I know you’re there and that I can slip back into the sin of my past but I won’t.  YOU DON’T CONTROL ME ANYMORE AND I DON’T NEED YOU TO MAKE ME FEEL ALIVE.  I want to be the man who can look the woman I love in the eyes and tell her that I will never hurt her and that I will always be there for her.  And my faith is the thing that gives me the strength to take 18 years of willing sin, recognize what I need to do and to act on it.  And I know that there many that look at me and scream hypocrite and whore, but who are they to judge who I am now by looking at my past?  And I did not change myself, Christ changed me.  He brought me out of my sin, where I thought I would always remain, and now is using me as a shining beacon to show many that THEY ARE NOT BEYOND CHRISTS HEALING HANDS.  And I may have much to learn, but I will be the light that is growing by forgiveness and faith.

God Bless.

I Never Thought I Would Be The Person I Am Today.

     One friend told me that she does not like that idea of me putting myself down for my past sins when I didn’t do nothing really bad.

     It really saddens me to say it, but I doubt many people back home actually know the real me and what I have done.  Only a handful in Miami actually know about… half of it.

     It sucks that I wasn’t honest with you guys.  Maybe I can change that.